26 July, 2019

Things are not what they seem. The Shinning Object Syndrome.

by Anila Bashllari


Why do we try to look good and pretty for others by capturing moments that are not real? What is this inner drive of constantly wanting to impress others, to look pretty and fit just to feel more fulfilled?

When we publish photos that do not represent reality in all its details, those who see such photos don’t feel good with themselves. Some don’t have the opportunity to travel, to visit luxurious places, to wear expensive clothes, etc.

Various researches have confirmed that social media makes us feel anxious and has a negative effect in our overall level of happiness. This happens because when people see that someone else is doing better than them, they don’t feel able to create a better life for themselves, they tell themselves that they are living a mediocre life or that their life is nothing compared to others.

But why do we constantly want to look good on photos? Why none of us posts photos fighting with our friends or lived ones, photos while crying, while eating random food… Why not?

The answer is simple – because during our lives we suffer from the “shining object” syndrome and by the need to be accepted and praised by others, the need of belonging in a certain group or social status.

We experience such behavioral tendencies since childhood: our parents ask us to eat the food, to stay calm, to get good grades, to go to sleep early… otherwise they will not love us anymore.

And we automatically try to make a good figure in front of our parents just to get their attention, their applauses and their love. TO WIN THEIR LOVE!

This is the sub-sub-reason of why we do things to get attention: just to feel accepted and loved by others!

ONLY NATURE HOLDS THE TRUTH – with its beauty, its fury, its calmness… Nature does not pretend to be something else and does not seek for acceptance. We are the ones who can’t live without it.

Photo by Freepik


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